emma

Every time I think about the life of Joseph Smith or his wife Emma, I am reminded of how easy my life is comparatively! They did everything they could to serve the Lord and follow the guidance he gave them, and they were constantly persecuted for it. Emma Smith had to watch as her husband was taken from her in the middle of the night, beaten, and eventually killed. As the prophet of the restoration, He sealed his testimony with his blood as did so many prophets before him.

" Joseph Smith, the prophet and seer of the Lord, has done more, save Jesus only, for the salvation of men in this world, than any other man that ever lived in it. In the short space of twenty years, he has brought forth the Book of Mormon, which he translated by the gift and power of God, and has been the means of publishing it on two continents; has sent the fulness of the everlasting gospel, which it contained, to the four quarters of the earth; has brought forth the revelations and commandments which compose this book of Doctrine and Covenants, and many other wise documents and instructions for the benefit of the children of men; gathered many thousands of the Latter-day Saints, founded a great city, and left a fame and name that cannot be slain. He lived great, and he died great in the eyes of God and his people; and like most of the Lord’s anointed in ancient times, has sealed his mission and his works with his own blood; and so has his brother Hyrum. In life they were not divided, and in death they were not separated!" -D&C 135

I love this video because it reminds me of the sacrifice not only of Joseph, but of his sweet wife Emma. I am so thankful for her faith and selflessnesss.

he knows

I started this post a week or two ago but was unsure of how to finish it. It seemed incomplete.  Then on Wednesday I received a letter from my friend Mandy that was exactly what I needed.  I love how my friends who are thousands of miles away can answer my prayers simply by listening to and following the promptings God gives them.  I want to share the quote she sent me, because I love it:

"The gospel is the good news that can free us from guilt. We know that Jesus experienced the totality of mortal existence in Gethsemane. It's our faith that he experienced everything- absolutely everything. Sometimes we don't think through the implications of that belief. We talk in great generalities about the sins of all humankind, about the suffering of the entire human family. But we don't experience pain in generalities. We experience it individually. That means he knows what it felt like when your mother died of cancer- how it was for your mother, how it still is for you. He knows what it felt like to lose the student body election. He knows that moment when the brakes locked and the car started to skid. He experienced the slave ship sailing from Ghana toward Virginia. He experienced the gas chambers at Dachau. He experienced Napalm in Vietnam. He knows about drug addiction and alcoholism. Let me go further. There is nothing you have experienced as a woman that he does not also know and recognize. On a profound level, he understands the hunger to hold your baby that sustains you through pregnancy. He understands both the physical pain of giving birth and the immense joy. He knows about PMS and cramps and menopause. He understands about rape and infertility and abortion. His last recorded words to his disciples were, "And, lo, I am with you always, even unto the end of the world." (Matthew 28:20) He understands your mother-pain when your five-year-old leaves for kindergarten, when a bully picks on your fifth-grader, when your daughter calls to say that the new baby has Down syndrome. He knows your mother-rage when a trusted babysitter sexually abuses your two-year-old, when someone gives your thirteen-year-old drugs, when someone seduces your seventeen-year-old. He knows the pain you live with when you come home to a quiet apartment where the only children are visitors, when you hear that your former husband and his new wife were sealed in the temple last week, when your fiftieth wedding anniversary rolls around and your husband has been dead for two years. He knows all that. He's been there. He's been lower than all that. He's not waiting for us to be perfect. Perfect people don't need a Savior. He came to save his people in their imperfections. He is the Lord of the living, and the living make mistakes. He's not embarrassed by us, angry at us, or shocked. He wants us in our brokenness, in our unhappiness, in our guilt and our grief. You know that people who live above a certain latitude experience very long winter nights can become depressed and even suicidal, because something in our bodies requires whole spectrum light for a certain number of hours a day. Our spiritual requirement for light is just as desperate and as deep as our physical need for light. Jesus is the light of the world. We know that this world is a dark place sometimes, but we need not walk in darkness. The people who sit in darkness have seen a great light, and the people who walk in darkness can have a bright companion. We need him, and He is ready to come to us, if we'll open the door and let him.
(Chieko N. Okazaki, Lighten Up, Preface; p. 174)
 
 
I love this in depth examination of the atonement of our Savior.  I know that he did suffer not only for our sins, but for "the pains and afflictions and temptations of every kind; and this that the word might be fulfilled which saith he will take upon him the pains and the sickness of his people."  (Alma 7:11)    I know that he's there, and  I know that he knows.

on the road again

"And Jesus saith unto him, The foxes have holes, and the birds of the air have nests; but the Son of man hath not where to lay his head" -Matthew 8:20

Saying goodbye to Nyla.. our favorite 93 year old Mormon in Morgantown

For some reason this scripture keeps popping into my head as I think about the adventures Sister Turner and I have been having.  For the past 6 weeks we have been traveling throughout the mission, and we have just been transferred to Fulton.. the very Southwestern corner of our mission.  There are a lot of corn and soybean fields here.  We are currently looking for an apartment and for a phone.  Our area is very large, and we are probably getting terrible gas mileage because our car is still full of suitcases!  Life is just a bit chaotic these days, but the work of the Lord moves forward!  And along the way, are learning a lot about patience and flexibility.  We have so many wonderful people from the church who are taking care of us as well.

A few weeks ago we were teaching a woman who had joined us for one of our church services for the very first time.  As we asked her about her experience, she told us that as soon as she walked through the chapel doors "it felt just like coming home".  She has been in and out of different churches her entire life, and has been searching for a place that felt right; a place that felt like God's house.  She was overjoyed to finally have found the place. 

I know that no matter where we are living or how chaotic our lives get, there is always a home for us nearby.  I love being a part of a church that is worldwide.  I love knowing that I can trust members of the church who I've never even met before.  I love knowing that this is Christ's church, that His spirit dwells there, and that I always have a home (even if I don't have an apartment or a  phone).

how to find happiness

I know that the gospel of Jesus Christ brings true happiness. I also know that God wants that for each and every one of His children.

(Moses 1:39 and 2 Nephi 2:27)

promised land

Yes, I know I am a little late for Independence day.  But I never get time to blog anymore and I have been thinking about this all week, soo... I will write it anyhow :).

                                               This is a picture of my niece that I stole from my sister

I hope you all had a marvelous 4th of July.  I have been thinking about how truly thankful I am to live in a country that is founded upon the principles of freedom.  At this time in my life, I am particularly thankful for the freedom of religion.  Were it not for freedom of religion in this country, Christ could never have re-established his church through the prophet Joseph Smith.

You might say we as members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints are a fairly patriotic people.  Even though the majority of our members live outside of the United States, we are all indebted to the early leaders of this nation because they allowed for an environment that enabled the restoration to take place.  We also study from a volume of holy scripture that was written primarily in the ancient American continent.  We study from the Holy Bible as well, but The Book of Mormon was written by ancient prophets in the Americas. 

These people, though far from Jerusalem, knew and prophesied for centuries about the coming of Jesus Christ.  And come He did.  After he visited the people in Jerusalem, he visited the Americas as a resurrected being.  The prophesy, "Other sheep I have which are not of this fold, them also must I bring, and they shall hear my voice; and there shall be one fold, and one shepherd" in John 10:16 was fulfilled when he told the Nephites and Lamanites, "Ye are they of whom I said: Other sheep I have which are not of this fold" (3 Nephi 15:21).

Christ is the Savior of the whole world, and God loves all of His children everywhere.  Of this I testify! 

God bless America

for the one

“What man of you, having an hundred sheep, if he lose one of them, doth not leave the ninety and nine in the wilderness, and go after that which is lost, until he find it?
“And when he hath found it, he layeth it on his shoulders, rejoicing.
“And when he cometh home, he calleth together his friends and neighbours, saying unto them, Rejoice with me; for I have found my sheep which was lost.

“I say unto you, that likewise joy shall be in heaven over one sinner that repenteth, more than over ninety and nine just persons, which need no repentance” (Luke 15:1–7).

The other day Sister Turner and I were talking about our traveling life.  Every day we drive hours to see just a few people; maybe even just one person.  We spend hours studying for just a few people; maybe even just one person.  We help them have faith in Jesus Christ enough to repent of their sins.  When they feel ready, we help plan their baptism. Baptism in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is a very sacred experience.  We do not call ninety nine people to the front as a spontaneous or momentary expression of faith.  Instead we spend days, weeks, maybe even months guiding that one individual through the beautiful process prepared by our Savior.  When that special day comes, the one feels ready.  The one understands the gospel of Jesus Christ and feels his love.  To me, seeing the change take place in that one... makes it all worth it.

"And we have suffered all manner of afflictions, and all this, that perhaps we might be the means of saving some soul: and we suppose that our joy would be full if perhaps we could be the means of saving some." -Alma 26:30



tender mercies

A few years ago Elder Bednar spoke about the "tender mercies of the Lord" mentioned in 1 Nephi 1:20.  Every day there are tender mercies given to us from our Father in Heaven as a reminder that he loves us and is watching over us.  The closer to God we become, the more we recognize these tender mercies. 

I remember the first night I arrived in Tennessee. I had spent two and a half weeks in the M.T.C. and still felt completely unprepared to go out and share the gospel with strangers full-time.  I didn't know much about serving a mission, or about my new home.  I was the only sister at the mission home, therefore I got my own room and queen bed to sleep in that night.  I remember sitting on my bed that night and staring out the window into the backyard.  There were rolling green hills and trees as far as I could see, and it was raining.  Green hills, trees, and rain are three of my favorite things.  In the distance there was lightning; another one of my favorite things.  Heavenly Father knew I needed those green hills and lightning that night, and he provided those tender mercies for me.  I thanked him for those tender mercies.

That was almost a year ago, and every day since then I have recognized tender mercies the Lord has given me.  Here are a few as of late:

 Fireflies (Sister Koford loves them too)

 Gallatin Ward Picnic

 Singing the National Anthem at the Sounds baseball game and seeing Sister Larsen and Wendy!

 Serving with one of my favorite companions.. again!

Passing signs for my favorite American town! (I have yet to go there but I've seen signs!)

I know that God is aware of me.  He is so aware of each of us.  He knows our needs, our wants, our likes and our dislikes.  He wants us to be happy, and provides many opportunities for us to be so.  It is up to us to recognize those tender mercies he gives us.

What are some tender mercies God has given you lately?

awake!

"Awake, my soul!  No longer droop in sin.  Rejoice, o my heart, and give place no more for the enemy of my soul." -2 Nephi 4:28

I have been incredibly tired lately. There has been so much going on the past week and I just can't seem to get enough sleep!  For some reason my body also decided that 5:00 a.m is the new time to wake up, so even when I do get some rest I am wide awake by 5 and can't fall back asleep.  It doesn't help that I am a traveling missionary now and will spend approximately 4 hours in a car every day driving all around Kentucky.  But I am not complaining!  I love it so much.  Waking up at 5 just means I have more time to prepare (mentally and spiritually if not physically) for the day and traveling all over the place means I get to meet so many great people!

I just felt like finding (and then sharing with you) a scripture reminding myself to stay AWAKE! 

(this is also for my dear Sister Larsen.. who is leaving the great TNM after serving here honorably for 18 months.  I sure will miss that woman.  "O MY HEART!")

eternity

How would it feel to know that the one you love the very most, the one you promise your life to, can be yours in the afterlife too? What would it be like to know that your marriage is not just "till death do us part" but "for time and all eternity?"  Well most of my best friends I was just telling you about.. they know what this feels like.  Because they were not just married for time but were sealed for all eternity in a house of God.

Most were married here..

 or here..

 or here..

These three temples are all in Utah, but there are actually 134 temples like these throughout the world. People often ask me about these beautiful temples: where are they? What are they for?  What do we do in them?  I tell them that one of the things that occurs in these sacred temples is these forever marriages.  A beautiful blessing of having the restored gospel is knowing how our families can be sealed together forever.  In the year 1836, God restored his priesthood and the sealing power of Elijah, which "turns the hearts of the fathers to the children, and the heart of the children to their fathers" (Malachi 4:5-6).  This is one of the main purposes of having these temples.

Although I am not yet married, I am able to go to the temple to worship and make covenants with my Father in Heaven.  I can also go there for peace and inspiration.  The temple is a sanctuary from the world; the closest thing to Heaven here on earth. Yesterday I was able to go to the Nashville, Tennessee Temple, where I felt God's love for me so powerfully and received many answers to my prayers.

I love to see the temple!

the kind that last

I've written quite a bit about my family in the past few months; more specifically about how the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints has strengthened my family and made us who we are today. It's something that has been made very clear to me as I've been thousands of miles away from them in a world where most families are falling apart. Something else I think about quite often is the impact that good friends have had in my life. Because most of my friends at home share my faith, the same principles that have blessed my family also made my friendships what they are today. A lot of my friends have been my friends since the beginning of time (or at least the beginning of our time). We played kickball together in elementary school, choreographed lip syncs together in Jr. high, suffered through braces and break-ups together in high school, and supported each other through college finals. Some of my best friends I didn't meet until after high school, but those friendships are just as strong. When most people think about large groups of college-aged girls, they probably think of one word: drama. But when I think about my girls, the words that come to my mind are love, trust, kindness, support, honesty, respect, creativity, and lots and lots of laughter.  I know that the gospel of Jesus Christ  has a lot to do with the good feelings my friends have and the high morals and standards we've helped each other maintain throughout the years. 

These are most (but  not all) of the girlies.  I love them so so much.  Always will.

"Living the gospel and being true to gospel principles is the key to true, lasting, triumphant friendship." -Jeffery R. Holland

endurance

There's a phrase we hear a lot in gospel context: endure to the end. Before my mission I spent a significant amount of time running.  I did not always like to run, but the more I did it the more I liked it.   As my sisters and I were training for the state capital half marathon last May, I learned a lot about enduring to the end.  My sister Emily is a very dedicated runner.  She understands the importance of daily conditioning and strengthening better than I do, and because of her dedication she passes me up every time. Even when she has shin splints and back aches she can't be slowed down.   When we ran the race, she was miles ahead.  My sister Annie and I stuck together most of the time.  I was thankful to have her at my side as we trained and as we ran the first 12 miles of that race.  When we got nearer to the 13 mile marker, however, Annie started to speed up.  My legs were aching like crazy and my ankles felt like they might break, so I panicked when Annie quickened her pace.  She made me realize that I could not give up during that last stretch after we had worked so hard to get where we were.  Annie sprinted that last mile to the finish line, and I did my very best to keep up with her.  Even though every part of me ached, I still remember that incredible feeling as I crossed the finish line and joined my awesome sisters. Every bit of conditioning and training, every ache and pain was worth it.

As a latter day saint, I do not believe the "once saved, always saved" philosophy that many people believe in today.  I believe that being a Christian is a lifestyle.  It is not a single event, or one spiritual experience that  makes us who we are.  It is not just going to church once a week that makes us who we are.  Rather, it is the things we do every single day that strengthen our faith and shape the people we are becoming.  Studying scriptures, praying constantly, trusting God and serving others are all aspects of enduring to the end. Sometimes this process can seem a little intimidating, overwhelming, or maybe even excruciating, but in the end I know it will be worth it.

"I would hat ye should come unto Christ, who is the Holy One of Israel, and partake of his salvation, and the power of his redemption.  Yea, come unto him, and offer your whole souls as an offering unto him, and continue in fasting and praying, and endure to the end, and as the Lord liveth ye will be saved." -Omni 1:26

I am a child of God

This just makes me :)

my friend

I'd like to tell you about my friend.
My friend didn't know she wanted to be my friend at first.
I had to bribe my friend to be my friend by offering to do her dishes.
We did her dishes.
My friend didn't want to listen to us, but we found out her weakness was books.
We gave her a Book of Mormon.
We accidently took the Book of Mormon back, but brought her a new one the next day.
My friend started reading and thought it was bogus.
But then she kept reading and realized it wasn't.
She asked if it was true and God told her "yes".
She quit smoking cold turkey without a complaint.
My friend had God on her side.
My friend was baptized three months ago for the remission of sins.
Since her baptism she has practically read the entire standard works...plus the history of the church.
My friend has been through more in the past few years than most of us go through in an entire lifetime.
Yet my friend keeps smiling, and finds something to laugh about every day.
My friend has become one of my best friends.
She started a blog of her own a few weeks ago; you can find it here.

Thanks for being my friend, friend.

the oak tree

On Sunday Elder Ballard shared this poem as he was talking about keeping ourselves strong during hard times.   I really liked it (and not just because it's about a tree) and I would like to share it as well. It reminded me of this 1400 year old oak tree my family and I found in South Carolina a few years ago..the Angel Tree.

The Oak Tree

by Johnny Ray Ryder Jr.

A mighty wind blew night and day

It stole the oak tree’s leaves away

Then snapped its boughs and pulled its bark

Until the oak was tired and stark

But still the oak tree held its ground

While other trees fell all around

The weary wind gave up and spoke.

How can you still be standing Oak?

The oak tree said, I know that you

Can break each branch of mine in two

Carry every leaf away

Shake my limbs, and make me sway

But I have roots stretched in the earth

Growing stronger since my birth

You’ll never touch them, for you see

They are the deepest part of me

Until today, I wasn’t sure

Of just how much I could endure

But now I’ve found, with thanks to you

I’m stronger than I ever knew

a pillar of light

Yesterday Sister Koford and I had the opportunity to teach a woman about the restoration.  We talked to her about the 14 year old boy Joseph Smith who went into a grove of trees to pray.  Joseph had a simple question to ask God, "Which church should I join?" yet he received a marvelous answer.  In his own words he said, "I saw a pillar of light exactly over my head, above the brightness of the sun, which descended gradually until it rested upon me.  When the light rested upon me I saw two personages whose brightness and glory defy all description, standing above me in the air.  One of them spake unto me, calling me by name and said, pointing to the other, Joseph: this is my beloved Son, hear him!"  God the father and his son Jesus Christ appeared to Joseph and called him to be a prophet, to restore the truths that had been lost after the death of Christ and His apostles. 

After we explained the first vision, I told Angelyn that I know this really happened.  I did not see a pillar of light, or have God appear to me, but I prayed just as Joseph did to know the truth.  My answer came more gradually and less obviously than Joseph's did, but to me it was every bit as powerful; because I now know with all my heart that Joseph was a prophet, and that he was called of God to restore Christ's church to the earth.  Angelyn's eyes filled with tears as we continued to talk about the different ways that God answers prayers.  We asked her to pray to know if what we were teaching was true, and as she agreed the spirit grew stronger and stronger.  We each felt God testifying to us in our minds and in our hearts that the things we were discussing were true.

Sometimes God answers our prayers with marvelous visions and manifestations such as Joseph's, but more often they come by the quiet whisperings and promptings of the spirit.  Elder David A. Bednar, one of the current twelve apostles, compares these different types of revelation to a light switch and a sunrise.  Joseph Smith, and Saul in the New Testament, had light switch experiences.  Angelyn and I had sunrise experiences-gradual and subtle but powerful nonetheless.  I know that even though God speaks to each of us in different ways, he truly does answer our prayers if we have enough faith to ask Him.  He loves us so much and wants us to have the truth.  Are you willing to find it?

best mother's day

In honor of this special holiday, I got to see and talk to my cute family over Skype yesterday! Words cannot express how great it was to see their faces and hear their voices after months of letters and emails. It felt like I was at home for just a short period of time. The words of this little primary song may be cheesy but they express exactly how I feel right now...

I have a family here on earth, they are so good to me.

I want to share my life with them through all eternity
Families can be together forever through Heavenly Father's plan.
I always want to be with my own family,
And the Lord has shown me how I can.
The Lord has shown me how I can!

(Families Can be Together Forever)

what am I doing?

I live a very different life right now. I live out of a suitcase with no permanent home, no job, and no friends or family closeby. I just moved to a new city where I know no one. Yet I feel quite content despite this uncertainty. I don't know exactly what I'm doing or where I'm going or who I'm talking to, but this much I do know: I am a missionary for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. "Behold, I am a disciple of Jesus Christ, the Son of God. I have been called of him to declare his word among his people, that they might have everlasting life." -3 Nephi 5:13 This is what I'm doing.

I'll go

"If by a still, small voice he calls to paths that I do not know, I'll answer dear Lord with my hand in thine: I'll go where you want me to go." Sister Jasper keeps making me listen to these lyrics, reminding me of the attitude every missionary must have! If I did not have this attitude, I would have never experienced this wonderful place, and I would never choose to leave it now. Cookeville is a place I will never forget. Not because of the historic train station or the cute town square or the college campus (even though they are all great) but because of the people I've met here and the miracles I've seen:

-People who treated me like a best friend when I was first a stranger.

-People who give all the money and time they can afford to serve God's children.

-People who open their doors to provide food and shelter to those less fortunate at any moment of any day.

-People who have enough faith to do what God asks even when the path is not easy.

-People who found the strength from God to overcome powerful addictions.

-People who prayed for the first time in years to know if God was really there, and then had us find them just moments later.

-People who were confused and frustrated by all religions until God sent us to explain the truth.

-People who truly understand the meaning of faith, hope, and charity.

-People who have become my family away from family.

I have come to love the people here so much. God's ways have been made a little clearer to me through these people I've met and the experiences I've had. I have faced some of my greatest challenges and disappointments, but also felt the greatest excitement, joy, and peace through it all. I have learned so much. Thank you, Cookeville (and Burgess Falls Ward). Now, the Lord needs me in Gallatin; so Gallatin is where I shall go!

storms

One of my favorite things about Tennessee is the rain. In Utah, when the weather calls for storms that usually means about 15 minutes of sprinkling rain every 4-5 hours; and even that only comes every few weeks or months. I did not even own a rain coat or an umbrella before I came to Tennessee! Here, a stormy weather forecast is a whole different story. Water pours down from the sky in a constant stream for days at a time, and it is usually accompanied by thunder and lightning. Making a mad dash from your car to the grocery store will leave you utterly drenched from head to toe. Every time we think it's about to cease, it starts right back up again! I absolutely love it.

Sometimes, however, it can be a little frightening. More than once I thought our car was going to flood because the puddles on the road were so deep. The worst place to be during these kinds of storms is our third story apartment. Often we are awaken in the middle of the night by the wind and rain beating against our windows (as you may remember me writing about here). The rooftop outside our window becomes a solid river of water, and the thunder will shake our entire building. It's exciting but terrifying at the same time.

During several of these storms, I have taught little children the primary song about the wide man and follish man Christ refers to in Matthew 7. "The rains came down and the floods came up; the rains came down and the floods came up" yet the wise man's house stood still because he was built upon a solid foundation. The foolish man who built upon a sandy foundation was not as fortunate.

What is our foundation built upon? Do we spend the majority of our time and effort worrying about money, clothes, furniture, music, movies, and the way we look? Or do we focus on the things that matter most, like our relationships with God, our families, and our friends? These are the things I am constantly asking myself to make sure my priorities are in line and my foundation is solid. I know that if my foundation is stable, these Tennessee storms (or the spiritual storms we face daily) cannot hurt me. Bring in on...I can handle it!
"Remember that it is upon the rock of our Redeemer, who is Christ, the Son of God, that ye must build your foundation; that when the devil shall send forth his mighty winds, yea, his shafts in the whirlwind, yea, when all his hail and his mighty storm shall beat upon you, it shall have no power over you to drag you down to the guilf of misery and endless wo, because of the rock upon which ye are built, which is a sure foundation, a foundation whereon if men build they cannot fall." -Helaman 5:12

good things

I've been thinking of something to write that would sum up the way I'm feeling after this wonderful Easter weekend, but I'm a little stumped. I have always loved Easter. Easter means life, Christ, sunshine, good food with the fam and my little nieces and nephews and Easter baskets. Even though it was hard for me to be away from home on this special holiday, however, there are so many special people and things happening here in Tennessee that I would never wish to be away from. My mission companions and I are experiencing so many daily miracles that show how much God cares about us and the work we are a part of.

Rather than write about all of them, however, I am going to refer you to Sister Warwood's blog, and Sister Jasper's blog. My awesome companions have put into words the way I feel better than I can. Please read them!